Confidence in our relationships comes from knowing that our feelings come from our thoughts, not from anything that anyone else says or does, and that others’ feelings come from their thoughts.
When we think we can make people angry, or that people can hurt us, we walk around putting up taller and taller walls so no one can get through and hurt us. We don’t get close to very many people, because we never know if they’re going to hurt us. We tip toe around other people because we think we can hurt them.
When we know that we cause our own emotions by what we think, we can be a lot more open. We can take the walls down and interact with people. We have confidence that if someone were to say something rude to us or about us, or if they were to point out a weakness, that we don’t have to be hurt, because we are only hurt when we think hurtful thoughts. We have confidence that we can do our best to be kind and loving, and sometimes people will have thoughts that hurt them, but in the end, we can’t cause their emotions. We are free to try to be our best selves.
How would knowing only you can hurt you help you to be more open in your relationships?