I’m sure you’ve heard the phrase, “Emotions are indicators, not dictators.” Our emotions are meant to tell us that something is good or something is wrong, not to run the show.
Sometimes it can feel like we have no control over how we feel, or how we react. This can feel so scary, and actually escalate our emotions as we try to hold them down.
You know those times when you feel like you might cry, so you resist it and then the tears start pouring and you start sobbing, and the more you try to stop, the harder you cry? Or you’re angry or irritated and you try to hold it back, but it seems to gain momentum until you completely explode?
Here’s an exercise to help you feel what you’re feeling instead of reacting uncontrollably, or pushing it down, only to explode later.
Take deep, slow breaths. Relax your shoulders. Relax your stomach. Relax anywhere that feels tense. Notice the sensations throughout your body: head, arms, legs, stomach, chest, mouth, fingertips, anywhere.
Choose one sensation. Ask yourself these questions. If you don’t have an answer right away, don’t worry about it, just move on to the next question.
Is it fast or slow? Hot or cold? Open or closed? Heavy or light? Tense or relaxed? Prickly or smooth? If it had a colour, what would it be? If you had to name it, what would you call it?
Then imagine the sensation is coming from a little pompom ball. You know those ones with googly eyes and felt feet?
Talk to this little creature. Welcome it to your home. Let it know it can stay as long as it needs to. I say something like this, “Hi Worry. I see you. You’re welcome to stay as long as you need to.”
Continue to just notice it and the sensations it makes in your body. If you’re really welcoming it, it will start to fade away in a few minutes. If it doesn’t, don’t worry, it can take practice to really feel the emotions.
Know that it will come back again. Name it. Welcome it. Then it will fade again. Usually emotions come and go in waves.
And that’s all. That’s how you feel an emotion rather than reacting to it. Later, when you’re not feeling it, you can ask yourself why you felt that way and decide what you want to do with that information.
Just know that your emotions aren’t dangerous. That’s why I like to picture them as little pompom friends. They’re just scared. It’s our job to notice them and care for them.
When we react it’s because we’re trying to ignore or push them away. They just want to be noticed and acknowledged.
P.S. Want to become a pro at feeling your emotions, and then learn how to create any emotion you want to feel at any time? Sign-up for a FREE 45-minute consultation with me and I’ll show you why you feel the way you feel, and how to feel the way you want to instead.